A relapse doesn’t occur all at once. There are usually 3 stages in the relapse process, and identifying them can help you avoid a full-blow return to drinking.
There are a lot of misconceptions about a relapse on alcohol or drugs. Sometimes, we think that a relapse is a failure or proof treatment didn’t work. Neither is true. Relapse is something that can but doesn’t have to be part of the recovery process. It’s also not a sudden event. Instead, there are stages of relapse. By being aware of these stages of relapse, you may be able to identify the signs early on in yourself or someone else and take steps to adjust what’s happening before there’s a full-blown relapse.
What Is an Alcohol Relapse?
Alcoholism is defined as a chronic condition that is the most severe version of alcohol abuse. When someone has an alcohol use disorder, they can’t control their drinking and continue to drink even with negative side effects. Alcohol use disorder can be classified based on severity, including mild, moderate, and severe. It’s treatable, but if untreated, it can lead to serious destruction and even death.
A person who misuses alcohol will feel like they are not able to function in their daily life without the use of alcohol. This is due to the changes in their brain chemistry due to their drinking. As with other chronic diseases, alcohol use disorder has treatment options and can be managed.
People will often go through treatment and have a period of sobriety. But what happens if, after being sober, someone starts drinking again? This is an alcohol relapse. An alcohol relapse means you go back to drinking regularly after having a period of sobriety without the use of alcohol.
Why Do People Relapse?
There are a wide variety of reasons someone might relapse. Examples of reasons for relapse can include:
Tempting situations, like returning to a setting or environment where you used to drink.
Stress, like insecure housing or social pressure lead to substance use as a coping mechanism
Untreated mental or emotional health disorders
Poor physical health, such as chronic pain
Guilt stemming from an initial lapse
Some people relapse because of a happy situation and associate alcohol with celebrating. Relapse can also occur if there’s a belief they’re past their addiction and can control their drinking.
Understanding triggers for alcohol use is important for someone in recovery and their loved ones. If someone knows their triggers, they can better avoid them and reduce their risk of a relapse.
Some of the most common alcohol triggers include:
Being with people you used to drink with
Certain times of the year, like holidays or anniversaries
Visiting places where you’d drink
Experiencing unwanted emotions
Alcohol exposure
Financial changes
Relationship issues
Boredom
If someone is in recovery, they might feel more of a temptation to drink again than normal. It’s helpful to have a relapse prevention plan that considers these triggers, with specifically identified strategies to address them.
The 3 Stages of Relapse
When we think about a relapse, we tend to think about it as sudden, unexpected, and all at once. In reality, it’s likely a gradual progression for most people, and there are typically three stages of relapse. Relapse isn’t just the event of going back to alcohol. Relapse is a process that can begin weeks or months before someone drinks.
Stage 1: Emotional Relapse
During this stage, someone isn’t thinking about drinking, but their emotions and behaviors are setting up a potential relapse in the future. Denial characterizes the initial phase since the person isn’t actively thinking about drinking. Signs of emotional relapse can include:
Trying to push emotions away
Isolation
Not going to meetings
Focusing on other people, like their problems or how you’re affected by other people
A lack of self-care
Problems with eating and sleeping habits
If you find yourself in an emotional relapse, try to learn more about how you can practice self-care. Self-care might be as simple as adjusting your diet or getting more sleep. Self-care can also mean taking better care of your emotional needs. Take time out for yourself, treat yourself with compassion, and let yourself have fun.
Stage 2: Mental Relapse
Once you reach a mental relapse stage, you might feel like there’s an internal war. Part of you could want to use, but the other part doesn’t. You may eventually have less cognitive resistance to relapse. Signs of mental relapse include:
Drug and alcohol cravings
Thinking about the people, places, and things that you associate with past use
Minimizing the consequences of your past use
Glamorizing past alcohol and drug use
Bargaining
Becoming deceptive
Trying to come up with plans to keep your use under control
Looking for opportunities to relapse
Actively planning a relapse
If you’re in a period of mental relapse, one of the best things you can do is work to find strategies to avoid high-risk situations. You could, for example, be going over in your mind permitting yourself to use in a certain situation. It can be hard for you if you experience a mental relapse because you might have felt that you’d never think about using again after treatment.
Don’t let this situation or cravings make you feel down or like you haven’t achieved something amazing already. You aren’t doing something wrong or failing in your recovery. You can work on strengthening your coping skills to move past a mental relapse. Working with a therapist can be helpful during a period of mental relapse.
Stage 3: Physical Relapse
Physical relapse is a return to using alcohol or drugs. Some clinicians will divide this stage of relapse into a lapse and then the actual relapse. A lapse is an initial situation where you might drink. A relapse is a return to using alcohol in a way that’s out of control.
Some people feel that relapse prevention is about saying no right before they take a drink. In reality, the physical relapse stage is the most difficult to stop, and it’s a final stage rather than a standalone. If you experience a physical relapse, you might need to return to treatment or revisit your relapse prevention plan. Treatment didn’t fail, and you didn’t either, but a physical relapse can mean that your treatment plan may need to be adjusted or evolve with your changing needs.